September 25, 2008

L-L-L-L-L-Lick me like a lollipop...

Here is something you may not know about me. I love rap! Yes, I am a suburban housewife who likes to bump in my car with my sound system that my husband had installed for me as a gift. I am one of those cars who pulls up next to you and causes your car to shake and your windows to vibrate. The thing I need though is tinted windows. That way no one can see that I am just a white, suburban housewife who likes alot of bass.

Now if you were to see me in the club, you'd really get a laugh. I'm a booty shaker. But I love to shake it! I just can't help it. The music/rap I like is just asking for a good ass shakin.

Just something random I thought I would share about myself. Now off to bump in my car all the way to Taco Bell.

September 23, 2008

And the World's Worst Stepmother Award Goes to...

Drumroll please...You guessed it! Me! But the thing is, I totally agree. Let me explain.

I expect my stepdaughter (Kaylee) to talk to me respectfully, drop the attitude, not use the word "whatever," brush her teeth, brush her hair, clean out her fingernails, pick up her room, maybe do a chore once in a blue moon, wash her hands, be respectful to her dad, not whine, be nice to the boys (dogs), be patient, not interrupt and not climb all over the furniture. Do you see how absolutely horrible I am? I guess I watched Cinderella one too many times as a kid. It seems the evil stepmother rubbed off on me. (oh and just because I said I expect this of her, does not mean I get it).

Her remaining time is spent playing with the Wii, watching Disney Channel, playing online with her Webkinz or just lounging in bed watching the newest movie to come out on dvd. What a horrible life.

I just don't understand why I can't let all this go and just let her run around wild with yellow teeth, dirty encrusted fingernails, tangled hair (which she finally had cut so it has cut down on the problem a tad) etc...If I did, we would never argue. Oh wait, we wouldn't argue until I asked her to do a small chore like wipe down the bathroom sink. The sink only she uses to brush her teeth.

The best part is her dad doesn't see any of this. Or maybe he does and just thinks it's no big deal. I don't know. She half hazardly wipes down the sink, shows him, who is the worst at details when it comes to cleaning, he signs off on it and she goes back to her room. A few minutes later I tell her to come wipe a few spots she missed and she's all "Dad said it was fine!" And then in a huge whine "Daaaad saaiiiiddd it was fiiiinnnneeeee." Insert set of evil eyes here.

Seriously. She is sweet until you ask her to do something and then the claws come out. She gets all huffy and puffy and ends up getting a huge attitude most of the time. So it just makes me the evil stepmother for asking her to do something. So my dilemna is...do I continue to ask her to do things or just let it go to avoid the fight? I know what the right thing to do is. But what about making my husband happy? He hates the fighting. I tell him about her attitude because I can't punish her...but then he hates it and says I am such a tattle tale. I wouldn't have to tattle if I could send her to her room for copping an attitude. It's a catch 22. Remain the evil stepmother and in the process the evil wife, or let it all go and hope she learns these things somewhere else before she reaches adult hood.

Overall, she is a great kid. I love her dearly. It's just she is getting to the pre teen age and I need to know how to proceed. I am assuming all this that has gone undealt with will only get worse with age. So what do I do?

*Just in case you missed the sarcasm, I don't really think I am the worst step mom in the world, I could use a bit of work but it is a thankless, frustrating job and it's not like there is a manual.

September 20, 2008

How would you feel?

If you were at a store grocery shopping and you were having a very difficult time getting something off a shelf, not just having trouble reaching it, but it was stuck to it's mates and they were heavy and starting to fall around you (laundry baskets)...If this were happening to you and you looked over and a man looked you straight in the eye, stood there with free hands and didn't offer to help or even lend a helping hand, would you feel like shit? It is obvious he saw you struggling, you made eye contact twice, he just stood there. Rude to say the least, right? If you were in the situation but in the guys' shoes, wouldn't you lend a hand? Wouldn't manners and instinct kick in?

This happened to me and I can't tell you just how horrible it made me feel. It made me feel like dirt. Like I was invisible. It ruined my entire day.

Do you believe that the way a man treats a woman in front of his children sets them up to either treat women the same way or allow themselves to be treated the same way? So if this man had a child with him, wouldn't he have been even more wrong? He showed his child that #1 it is ok to treat others like this and #2 it is ok if someone treats them like that. The whole situation had me first seeing red and secondly wanting to cry my eyes out. What is with people? Does he treat the people he loves the same way? If so, I feel horrible for his family.

September 15, 2008

The Forlorn Black Dog

You may have wondered who the black dog in the pictures is. Well, her name is Autumn and she is our neighbors' dog. Frank and I have really grown fond of Autumn after watching her day in and day out, out in the backyard, alone. No one to pay to attention to her, no one to talk to her, play with her, love her. She is a true 24 hours/day outdoor dog. She has a dog house and I have seen 2 abandoned toys but that's it. So Frank and I started to talk to her and pet her every time we went in the backyard (at least 5-6 times a day). After all, who could ignore the wagging tail and smiling face at the fence?

About two weeks after we had moved in (I had talked to her only a handful of times and the same goes for Frank) Autumn made a break for it and broke out of her backyard. Where did she come? Our front door. LOL. Really. I was in bed sick and I heard a ruckus outside. I went outside in the front to figure out what the boys were reacting to and saw Autumn in our front yard and Frank on the porch. I went out and saw her family calling to her from their yard but watched as she gleefully ignored them and ran to Frank and I when we called her name. That was just the first time this has happened.

Frank has taken her back from our front door on more than one occasion and every time they just plop her back in the backyard and leave her alone. So...I have been pretty upset about this and I think that a backyard dog is no life at all. Frank and I had even decided that on cold/snowy/rainy nights we would offer our garage to her if her owners would allow it. We even talked about putting a doggy door in the door for her. That changed yesterday.

Yesterday Autumn ended up at our front door again. Frank took her back but no one was home this time. She can't come in the house, she is literally like a bull in a china closet due to her lack of socialization. But we couldn't just leave her to roam the streets so Frank put her in our backyard. I thought that was a great idea and proceeded to take her some water and a chewie to keep her back there. And that is where the story begins.

You'd have to see a picture, which I don't have right now, but to completely understand you will have to see it. We have access to our backyard through our garage. But it isn't just a straight walkout, there are stairs that lead up to the backyard. OK so I shut the door behind me and proceed to take her the water and chewie. She is ALL over me and as I try to maneuver my way back inside the garage (the boys are on the other side) she uses all her weight to push into the garage. So then she is racing around the garage like a mad woman, no big deal. Cooper makes a run for the backyard and I call for Autumn to follow, she does and so does Cody. She barrells over Cody a bit on the stairs and when he stops at the top stair, she is all over him. It didn't really look playful, more intrusive if anything. Now Cody and Autumn bark at each other back and forth along the fence. The run up and down the fence barking at each other. I used to stop it but they seemed to have so much fun doing it and it gave them some extra exercise so I just allowed it.

So Autumn starts following Cody closely and I can see he is getting stressed because she keeps putting her face in his face. So I start to push her away and tell her to "go on." The way the stairs are set up, there is a cement wall about a foot tall between the grass and the stairs. I am still on the stairs and Cody is next to me but the cement wall is between us. That's when Autumn really went for it. She started to put her mouth on his neck, wouldn't back up, was using all of her body force against me and my arms, which I was trying to put in between them, she had him pinned up against the wall, he was crouching and she had her mouth on his neck. Cody cried out in pain. I was screaming at Autumn to "get off!" and pushing her with one arm while trying to pick Cody up with the other. She would not back off.

I can't really remember what happened but Cody must have slipped away while I was trying to hold Autumn back. He ended up at the bottom of the stairs where the closed door was. The bottom of the stairs is like 3'x2 1/2' so it isn't very big. All of the sudden Cody was down at my feet and Autumn was on top of him and I was still screaming and trying to pull her off. She was trampling him and going after him with her mouth. All of the sudden the door opened and I am screaming to Frank "get Autumn! she is attacking Cody!" He grabbed her by the collar and was able to lead her up and out of the yard. She was happy to see him so she went with him. He was able to get their back gate open and he put her back in her own yard.

Now honest to God, I don't know if she was playing or not. I have read about reading a dog's body language and I do not believe she was playing. However, it is all a blur because I was freaking out so much. I remember hearing a growl at one point and I don't believe it was Cody. The only sound Cody made was a cry, a cry I have never heard him make before. Obviously she hasn't been socialized so she may have just jumped Cody because she doesn't like him. I just don't know. All I know is it scared the crap out of me! I literally thought I was going to watch Cody get eaten in front of me and I wasn't going to be able to do anything about it. It was so scary and I shook for hours afterwards. Of course Frank doesn't think she was trying to hurt him (he wasn't out there either) and he thinks I am being dramatic about it. I can't explain how badly it hurt my feelings that she would do this to my baby. After all the kindness we showed her.

So this morning I take the boys out to potty and Cody starts barking at the gate towards the front yard. I was in my bathrobe and thinking "great, the guy is here to read the meter and I am going to have to go in the wet grass to retrieve my barking dogs, in my black socks and pink bathrobe. Oh and not to mention the bedhead." I walk up the steps and who is it? Autumn. And she is looking like she is going to jump the fence. The first thing I think is "if she makes it in here, we're done because Frank isn't here to help." So quickly I tell the boys to "stay" and I run inside the house, through the garage. I grab a leash, walk out the front door and call her name. There she comes, barrelling down on top of me. She is so excited (aka bored, not exercised, not stimulated etc...) that she jumps all over me. I get the leash on her and then realize, what the hell am I doing? I mean, nothing has changed. I am still in my black socks, pink robe and bedhead. Great. So I try to un latch her so I can go get dressed to take her home. Not happening. Just like she used her body weight to push her way into the garage, she was doing the same with my front door. So there we were, stranded on my front porch. But wait! I had my cell phone in my pocket. Only because I had just gotten off the phone with Frank. For the next 5 minutes I fight her jumping body to see the phone number on the tag. Got it! They pick up after 5 rings. I say "hi, this is your neighbor and Autumn is at my front door. I'm sorry, I am in my bathrobe so I didn't want to bring her over." She apologized and sent her daughter out to get her. Her daughter walked out and Autumn ran to her. I called across the yard that Autumn had gotten out yesterday too while they were away but we had put her in their backyard. She said she was sorry and walked away.

I walked back to the backyard and this time the boys were oblivious to the chaos. They were both taking a dump LOL. And then there was Autumn, back to her usual spot at the fence. Back to her days and nights of seclusion. I don't feel so sorry for her after what she did to Cody but I am sure that her lack of training and socialization is to blame. It's too bad but now we know we can't offer to walk her with us or offer our garage to her. Not if we want to keep our own boys safe.

I will still talk to her but the bond has been broken. She hurt my feelings when she went after my baby. I will still help rescue her when she gets out but she better not try to jump in my backyard again.

So my dilemna at this point is do I tell her owners what she did? In case something were to happen in the future?

Oh and Cody is ok. He was shaken up, had a red mark on his neck but no injuries. He has been having diarrhea and he threw up this morning (nothing too unusual for him though) but I think it is from the stress of it all. I don't know for sure that she didn't jump on his stomach but he acts ok. And unfortunately I don't have the money to go get an x ray done. But like I said, I really don't think it is necessary. I think he is fine. He got a bath so I could see his skin better and he smells great and looks wonderful! And now we know Cooper won't be stepping in to save his brother in time of trouble. At least not when a 65 lb black lab is involved LOL.

September 8, 2008

Purely Pictures as Promised

Cody looking sweet
Cooper looking comfy and oh so kissable
The neighbor dog, Autumn, playing fetch
Isn't my Cooper just adorable?
My precious Cody
The boys checking out their new yard.
Taylor playing ball with Cody and Cooper
Playing with our neighbor dog Autumn
Poor Autumn. She is alone and outside 24/7.
My baby boys looking cute as usual